I’m sure the title question is one you’re familiar with. It’s sometimes a silent question at the back of your mind, or it’s a loud, pleading question you ask out loud. Over the past three months or so, I’ve been oscillating back and forth, asking God where we’re supposed to go from here.

I ask that question all the time, and I’ve asked it over and over again for years. My wife and I have travelled and lived in many countries, and that question still remains. I realize quite clearly that God knows the answers and I don’t. Trusting God, then, is what I need to do.

A year ago I didn’t even know if my job was secure. I had a temporary, 3-month contract position. I had applied to universities across Ontario for Education (teacher training and certification), but I wouldn’t get an answer for months. So each Sunday (and often on my way to work, actually) I asked God that simple question: Where am I going? I think I ask that question because I want to know what’s going to happen next; I want a sneak preview. In another sense, I think I want to take that excitement of not knowing away.

Did God lead me in righteous ways? Absolutely. I’m studying now for my B.Ed, at 34 years of age, and God has helped me all the way. Incredible.

So why do I feel so anxious these days about “where I’m going?” Why is it that my stomach churns, and I grind my teeth at night, thinking about the uncertainty?

I attribute this anxiety to my lack of faith, and in particular, a lack of quality time with God. Sounds crazy, but there is certainly a direct correlation between the time you spend in prayer with God and the way you deal with worry and anxiety over uncertainty. I’m praying that over the next few weeks, I’ll devote and commit more time to reading the Bible and getting clearer about who is in control of everything, and clearer about who will lead me to where I’m going. He’s done it all my life, so there’s no reason to worry that He won’t do so in the future. This is our loving and caring God.