What will my life look like? Where will I go, who will I see, and how will I get there? These are surely some of the biggest questions we ask ourselves.

The Christian answer is a beautiful one: God, the Father, is painting on a canvas that is so large, we can only see a small portion of the entire canvas. We want to see more, but it’s not in our time to do so.

Another illustration that I came across, and one that I think is so meaningful, comes from Ravi Zacharias, from his book, “Walking from East to West.” Early in the book, he writes about his trips back to his birth country, India. In the north of India, he tells us, the most beautiful wedding saris are made there. Marvelous colors of gold, silver, red, blue, are threaded together in spectacular ways. More often than not, the saris are handmade by a highly skilled artisan. The artisan, usually male, sits on a platform, and his assistant, often a son, sits a few steps down from him. The father has all the spools of silk threads to use at his discretion, and he pulls the threads together using his acquired creative wisdom. The son, meanwhile, responds to his father by moving a shuttle from one side to the other. Over time, the process is so efficient that little communication is needed: a slight nod by the father would signal an action by the son. “Everything is done with a simple nof from the father.” If you’re watching the process, you’d never know what pattern would result from the complex process.

This wonderful story illustrates our inability to see the patterns that the Father has in mind until it’s been revealed, slowly but surely. The design of our God is primary; we react to our Father’s design, namely, His will for us.

I’m positive that many times in our lives we wish to take control of the spools of thread. We want to be the designer, the maker of our life’s tapestry. We want to weave individual threads that would make us richer, healthier, more popular, more beautiful or handsome. We want to weave individual threads for our advantage. This isn’t what God wants for our lives.

For the past several months, I’ve struggled with the first few questions I wrote at the beginning: where am I going, how will I get there? And I can add that I’ve tried to do things my own way, trying to devise plans that will get me where I want to be. The question that remains to be answered is, “What’s God’s plan for my life?”

The Bible assures us that God has a plan for our lives, and that He does all things for our good. My frustration comes because I want control. Submitting to God takes all the control away from me, and that frustrates and scares me.

If our lives are a beautifully woven tapestry from our creator, who am I to want control of the spools? Are my hands so skilled to weave patterns of incredible beauty? Of course not. I can already see the blotches and errors in the tapestry of my life before; those times when I tried to reach up and grab control of the spools. God, always knowing, let me have a go at it, and now I can see the evidence of my selfish desire for control.