There are days at work when I’m filled with self-loathing, believing my situation is worthless. The work I’ve been given to do is not especially difficult or stressful, which is perhaps the primary challenge for me. I’m seeking work that will not only reflect what I’m capable of doing, but work that reflects who I am as a person. I know very well that we shouldn’t identify ourselves with our work, but that nagging feeling that I should be doing something better or more important still seems to plague me.

On the flip side, I know that I’m there for a reason, however temporary that might be. I have my sights set on something a few months down the road, but what if that goal never materializes? What then?

I have to constantly remind myself to keep walking, to not look at my situation in the now, but to set my eyes on things above. It’s hard, I’ll tell you, but what good is it to keep my sights set on my own worries?

I’m praying that this time of work is fruitful, in whatever way possible, and that I continue doing my work diligently.

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